Skip to main content

How I'm doing: Rage room done, and now getting ready for radiation

I thought I'd have a lot to write about the rage room. Like a lot of this experience, I'm not sure I want to spend the time, at least now. 

It was cathartic and I'm glad I did it, but I had moved past a lot of those feelings by the time I got there. And then there was the meta-level stuff: The irony of smashing old technology as a writer who works in tech (a huge HP printer/fax machine, a flat monitor, and a few old keyboards) didn't escape me. Nor did the irony that when I smashed them, remnants of plastic and other materials literally filled the air, the smell reminding me of how I was absorbing and breathing the stuff that likely caused my cancer. (Because, it wasn't a cancer gene.)

I still recommend finding an outlet to hit things. The feelings that came out — sadness and disappointment over having my life change, anger that my family has had their own battles with the bullshit and horrors of cancer — needed to leave my body, just like the cancer itself. 

Update on my next step, radiation: 

Wednesday will be a kickoff of sorts, when I go in for a "simulation" to help my doctor create an uber-specific plan to target the exact area of my breast that needs it. He anticipates I'll start the 4 weeks of daily (M-F) radiation treatments on March 25 (to be confirmed).

I really like my radiologist. He's approachable, young-minded, easy to talk to. He doesn't know it yet, but I'm going to ask a professional favor, to gut check my argument for expanding breast cancer patient information for active and proactive people too. :)

Some other info on this step of the journey:

  • Each treatment is about 20 min, 5x a week, for 4 weeks (I live 12 min away from the hospital, so this isn't that big of a deal!)
  • I'm told to expect a sunburn to the treated area that slowly develops over the 4 weeks
  • Can't go into chlorine during radiation
  • Might have pigmentation change that lasts forever, or a year, or a short time—or no change at all
  • Everyone—patients, nurses, the doctor—has told me to prepare for intense fatigue
  • Radiation shouldn't affect my bloodwork
  • I'll need to keep the area out of the sun for ... not sure if it's forever or just during treatment.
  • Still get free parking (heh)
I learn more in my patient education session after the simulation on Wednesday.

Thanks for being there, as always.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Sara's playbook for dealing with cancer

My care team has commended my playbook for managing symptoms and dealing with cancer treatment.  I can't compare my cancer experience to others', because everyone's cancer is different. But, I can say that I'm coming out of this feeling like a better version of myself, and I didn't experience the intensity of symptoms that most people experience.  I'm a firm believer in doing what I can to manage what's thrown at me and take control where I can.  Here's my playbook for dealing with cancer in case it's helpful.  Note: If you think it might help to share with someone who has a recent diagnosis, I recommend first asking them if they're open to a perspective on managing life during treatment, sharing only if they say yes.  I treated food as fuel. I learned which ingredients reduce inflammation and which ingredients help the body recover, and I chose foods with them instead of comfort foods as often as possible. These ingredients can be found across c...
1 comment
Read more

How I'm feeling: Warmth from returning to work

I went back to work this week, and the best word I can describe it is dreamy. You read that right.  I had the best welcome back from teammates and others. The best. I truly felt joy seeing them, and I received so much warmth and even love back, it really makes me count my blessings. The only triggers I had were problematic, institutional terms in our work that we haven't solved yet!  I also reviewed final content from a big project I had been working on before I left, getting to see how the team finished the foundation we started and how they applied the content guidelines I drove. I couldn't tell the difference between what I wrote and what they wrote, which is amazing! This is what you want to happen! It was also dreamy because my directive from my new manager and partner lead recognized my leadership and strategy skillset, versus a more tactical starting point of, "Can you write this line of copy?" Like I said, dreamy .  There was a weird part I got through. I re...
1 comment
Read more

How I'm doing: Positive reflections as I head back to work

My Florida trip brought paddle boarding, crystal clear waters, tequila, sunshine, and laughs with friends. My final few days before work are a wonderful balance of downtime, long walks with Monty, rest, and fitness. I was also asked to be one of the speakers at the hospital cancer center's Survivors' Day of Celebration this year. Yes, there's so much to celebrate!  And, it's fitting to share my reply to an e-poll question that I answered in a group of former colleagues. The question was, " If you could relive one year of your life, which would it be? "  Here's what I wrote:  " My first thought was age 26. I just remember it as coming into my own and having so much fun. Then I saw [so-and-so's]  mention of studying abroad, and my 2001 experience changed my life in so many ways. But my final answer, if I were to pick one year, would be this past year, actually!  "A year ago at this time I finally, finally just felt so comfortable in my own skin...
Post a Comment
Read more